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This section on Narcissism is designed to 'help' provide a greater understanding of the condition; it is not intended as any form of condemnation or judgment of Rugby League players or others involved in the game; nor is it aimed at any other individual who may suffer from one of the many forms of Narcissism. It is a 'societal' problem; not restricted to a sport and not a means by which anyone should be judged or labeled. It is also not intended to provide any form of excuse or defence for the behaviours often exhibited by the Narcissist, particularly those of an antisocial nature. Narcissism provides no legitimate mitigation for any inappropriate behaviour. If ignored however, it will continue to cause significant harm to those peripherally associated; friends, teammates, family, the clubs, the league et al. It requires serious attention. Audio Unavailable at this time
It is the combination of
Narcissism & Nihilism that truly defines post-modernism. One of the pitfalls of celebrity status, fame or notoriety is that of Narcissism, or more accurately 'acquired situational narcissism'. Unfortunately, Narcissism is becoming increasingly prevalent within society and is no longer restricted to the minority. Examples can be seen across all socio-economic groups; in many occupations, professions & vocations; in sport, politics, religion and so on. Once the hallmark of actors, the rich & famous, artists, musicians & rock 'gods', it's now pervaded our very suburban precincts. This is not to imply that a narcissist lurks around each corner or that someone is either a narcissist or not. It is not that simple; not that 'black or white'. There are degrees of Narcissism and differing manifestations or exhibited behaviours for these. Suffice it to say, Narcissism exists; it is increasing in both intensity & numbers; and is exerting great pressures throughout society. Our culture, being based on temporal, superficiality, image & materialism; along with a 'fast food' mentality of 'immediate gratification' enhances and promotes the development of the condition. If seeds were sown in earlier developmental years (primarily early childhood & adolescence), the greater the likelihood of it occuring or being exhibited. There are a great many factors involved in relation to the subject of Narcissism and much of this is covered in the text book; 'Mental Health for Rugby League'. For the purpose of this website & need for relative brevity, many of the details are in 'point form' or summarised.
Narcissism, according to the Oxford Dictionary - 'a morbid self-love or self-admiration'. In Psychology and Psychiatry it is expanded to include 'self-obsession', 'self-centredness', 'conceit' 'vanity', 'egotism', 'over-inflated self worth'. It can also be described as 'elitism' when applied in a group setting. The Diagnostic & Statistical Manual (DSM) IV-TR, the clinicians diagnostic reference tool, describes it as; "An all-pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behaviour), need for admiration or adulation and lack of empathy, usually beginning by early adulthood and present in various contexts". There are also differing types of Narcissism; from Narcissistic Personality Disorder, 'Malignant Narcissism', 'Reactive of transient Narcissism' to 'Acquired Situational Narcissism' (ACN). It is the latter for which this section is primarily dedicated. When we 'break down' the term Acquired Situational Narcissism (using the Dictionary meanings & definitions) it can be seen as:
As you can see, ACN is a form of 'Narcissism' where the symptoms are evident as a result of 'circumstances' that have been 'achieved' or 'acquired'; such as an individual 'thrust into the spotlight' or a world of increased attention or profile, fame or fortune and so on. As a reminder, being placed in situations such as these does not, in any way, imply the individual concerned will develop or exhibit ACN or the associated symptoms.
One of the many mistakes people often make in their appraisal of potential Narcissism, is the failure to see its manifested symptoms in the context of demographics, cultures & sub-cultures and the variety of developmental & social factors that can affect how it's exhibited. Most literature tends to focus on the 'high end' of the spectrum or scale, or the 'extreme' symptoms. Narcissism knows no boundaries; it is potentially applicable to all. From the 'wealthy' & 'famous' movie star or celebrity, politician, businessman right down to the local 'small town' footy player whose fame & notoriety is played out on a much smaller scale. The only difference is the increased likelihood of developing ASN as one 'rises' the ladder of profile & success. Remember, it is the attention & recognition they seek. This can be accomplished at any level, though often more likely to be 'fantasy-based' when exhibited in a smaller societal microcosm.
As stated before, the Narcissist is more interested in 'what people think of them'; the reaction to their presence or being, rather than 'who they really are' or their genuine value or worth.
Narcissism has its roots in developmental stages, though aspects pertinent to genetic predisposition and biochemical factors should not be discounted as potenial contributing factors. ASN is traditionally believed by experts to be of late onset; adolescence or beyond, though it is probable that many of those who succumb to, or exhibit ASN most likely had the pre-morbid traits & tendencies already. These underlying characteristics and behavioural 'seeds' could quite possibly provide the unconscious motivation, a type of self fulfilling prophecy, whereby they are drawn toward those socio-economic situations, occupations, sports & fields of endeavour that enable the Narcissist to satisy their internal needs. One could draw the analogy of the 'fuel just waiting for the fuse to be lit'.
Abuse by parental figures, peers, role models & significant others is one of the primary factors common amongst those who develop Narcissistic behaviour, as it is with many other 'Personality Disorders or Disordered Traits'. This abuse can take the many forms; physical, verbal, sexual, psychological &/or emotional. Similarly, the 'smothering', 'protective', 'doting' behviour of a parent or parents may also contribute, as can the 'idealization' of the child.
In essence, it is that which impinges upon an individual's capacity to develop the correct, healthy & necessary skills to participate in and interact with the world around them in a socially acceptable & appropriate manner; to develop a healthy self esteem, sense of self & clear identitiy; to comprehend boundaries and societal & cultural values. Narcissism of any type can be seen as a defence mechanism employed to protect the fragile ego & questionable self esteem; to reinforce the 'false self' and hide or suppress the 'real self'.
Classically, ASN or any type of Narcissism is associated with celebrity status, wealth &/or fame. though brain injuries &/or medical or organic conditions may result in 'reactive/transient' narcissistic and antisocial behaviours. The latter is of significant concern to body contact sports where concussion and head injuries are common and the use of illicit, recreational substances is well reported. Both can result in trauma to the brain and can often go undetected.
The developmental processes through which we all pass are generally universally accepted by most scholars. These identified periods of our lives are 'transitional'; from birth to death; covering the full gamut of our existence. To grow and mature one must pass through these stages of 'transition', from one to another (the next).
Emotional & social retardation due to poor transition through the adolescent years and the mere 'chronological' passage into adulthood has ill-prepared the league player for the rigours and vicissitudes of simple existence, let alone the extra burdens, pressures & stress associated with life as a footballer. When does one progress to the next stage? Is it only when injury or retirement necessitate or enforce such a change? If so, then the effect at this time of life can be devastating.
To get the best from a player and the maximization of their potential and skill, the coach's aim is to build confidence & self belief. When translated across the entire playing roster, the team's confidence, as a whole, rises. The team must believe it is 'better' than its opposition. If not, winning becomes unlikely; and that is the goal; to win. There is nothing wrong with this approach. It is employed in every facet of our lives and in nearly every occupation; particularly those that employ a group of 'team' framework. To get the best from the team, you need the best from the individual and vice versa. Three (3) other essential elements to a strong, sustainable & effective team (or group) are (1) interdependence; (2) sense of belonging & (3) identification with that team or group. The problems arise when extrapolated outside the sport and the very field on which it's played. Remember, fans, the media, club officials, sponsors etc. will always provide 'Narcissistic supply' (or unconditional positive feedback - admiration & acknowledgement); even off the field and in general social settings. The player does not have to earn it, work for it or even deserve it based on their individual personality or effort. It is freely given in bountiful quantities; and merely by the identification with the team/group. As such, a sense of elitism or entitlement can often be seen in the behaviours of sportspersons in social situations. It can become a type of expectation; without challenge; almost a right. All behaviour is not necessarily appropriate, though the assumption is that it's surely tolerated and accepted (because of who they are), including that which is contrary to societal values, norms, mores & expectations. As a group one can feel somewhat protected and more likely to be adventurous, as the group members provide the necessary safety, encouragement and support. They may believe themselves to be superior or 'better than' those average individuals that share the same social setting. Any challenge to this does not indicate restraint, but retaliation or 'justifiable' response; often aggression and antisocial acts. Women provide the 'male' Narcissist, or 'group member' with a much needed 'trophy' and many are only too willing to accommodate. They too are impressed and overvalue the narcissist or admired group member. Some unfortunately are not (the naive, vulnerable or overly trusting) or they have their own 'agenda'; possibly a degree of notoriety themselves or their own 'trophy collecting'; they are those who often expose the misbehaviour or speak out about the wrongdoings of the player. The other pertinent fact is that the consumption of alcohol and the partaking of illicit substances will often cloud any residual judgment or capacity to reason the player might have. Narcissism plus alcohol/drugs is a particularly dangerous mix. Given the propensity for elitism to develop in a group (in this case, footballers), there is little doubt that a sense of entitlement, superiority, power & prejudice will result. The group is narcissistic, not the individual members. If you throw one or two genuine narcissists into a group such as this, the adverse effects will probably intensify, particularly when substance use such as alcohol has been added to the mix and has already lowered self control & reduced inhibitions. The individual narcissist's internal drive and 'desire' for excitement, control & their inherent 'above the law' belief & grandiosity can often provide the catalyst for group misbehaviour.
The best comparison to 'Narcissistic Supply' is that of 'junk food' or similar food substances. Most would generally agree that the over-indulgence in unhealthy foods will acheive unhealthy results. There is also the capacity for 'craving' of these unhealthy substances. The same applies to our 'mental food'. Unhealthy input, overindulgence or cravings will have an unhealthy result; psychologically & socially. Mental food takes the form of input from others around us; in all forms of feedback; in a range of social, occupational levels & settings and in a multitude of relationship types, societal, group, interpersonal; casual or intimate. Whilst this can be 'narcissistic supply', it is not the psychological basis for the 'need'. It is the Reaction that is most sought. The Narcissist is seeking attention; wishing to be noticed, talked about, looked at; they seek the reactions of others in their presence. It is their addiction of choice.
All this supply is freely given to generally all of higher profile, celebrity status or those of wealth &/or fame. The well-balanced, well adjusted individual takes it for what it is, understands why it occurs, and feels somewhat undeserving of the degree of attention; humbled and politely appreciative. Some may even avoid or shy away from situations where this might occur or be displayed. For the Narcissist, however, it is a requirement; a need; a 'must have'; it is who they are & why they exist.
This diagram indicates that which the Player gives to those directly or indirectly associated with them. These differing entities profit from the player; some can be considered ‘needs’. The benefits noted are not in themselves ‘Narcissistic Supply’ though should any individual in these particular areas be a Narcissist, one can easily understand how this then becomes ‘Narcissistic Supply’. Should this player cease to exist, retire, disgrace themselves to the point of no return, the Narcissist will fill the void with another. It must be noted that ‘family’ & ‘true’ friends might not necessarily adopt this approach and certainly the player in this situation is not considered a Narcissist; it applies to any player.
The diagram represents the sources, flow & types of ‘Narcissistic supply’ the player might receive. As stated before these elements are given freely to any player (or high profile athlete, celebrity etc.); it only becomes ‘Narcissistic supply’ when the individual receiving it is a Narcissist. Any player put in this position will find this type of ‘food’ difficult to digest. Who among us would not like the positive input from others; the unconditional acceptance and admiration and all its temporal trappings. No matter whether narcissistic or not, this type of supply will have an impact on the player’s life; one way or another. It would be nigh on impossible for an individual to escape an effect that will surely ensue.
Therein lays the fine line. To what extent do we like, accept or 'love' ourselves? Is 'Narcissism', any narcissism and to any degree, healthy or acceptable? Narcissism must always be viewed as a protective mechanism. If it consumes the persona of the individual in every aspect of their lives; it will take control and most definitely become unhealthy. If, however, it is employed on occasions where a defence of self esteem & self worth os needed, then it may be considered 'healthy'. Many supporters claim 'healthy narcissism' can be identified by two (2)
main factors; the capacity for genuine 'empathy' & the ability to recognize and function in
'reality'. Unfortunately, these same two (2) characteristics also identify Narcissism of a pathological
nature.
I’m sure by now, most women would be applauding the apparent denigration of the narcissist – HE deserves it! But let me assure the reader, ‘it cuts both ways’. Just because ‘Narcissus’ in Greek mythology was male; does not mean that narcissism belongs only to the male of the species. Quite the contrary, narcissism sits just as well with the fairer sex, despite being more prevalent in men. All of the traits and behaviours, self obsession and feelings of inflated, overvalued self appraisal are not gender bound. They translate equally well, though perhaps demonstrated and manifested in a slightly different manner; as of course one would expect.
In her 2006 book ‘Generation me: Why Today’s Young Americans are more confident, assertive, entitled- and more miserable than ever before’ Dr. Jean M. Twenge, Ph.D. discovered in her extensive years of studies & surveys that there was and is a startling increase in the overvaluation of the individual & their opinion of themselves. She wrote ‘In the early 1950’s, only 12% of teens aged 14 to 16 agreed with the statement “I am an important person”. By the late 1980’s, an incredible 80% - almost seven times as many – claim they were important.’ She goes on to say” Narcissism is one of the few personality traits that psychologists agree is almost completely negative. Narcissists are overly focused on themselves and lack empathy for others, which means they cannot see another person’s perspective. They also feel entitled to special privileges and believe they are superior to other people.”
Whilst this statement & the studies conducted are not gender-based, it is relevant to make reference in this particular section, due to the rapid growth in the fashion industry & the focus on the superficial aspects of appearance & image through role modeling and media, financial status and so on. These are areas generally targeted at, but not restricted to, women, especially younger adolescent females.
The danger for those of high profile within the sport; at what ever level and on whatever stage (environment) in which it’s played, is the potential for attachment to the female narcissist.
To begin with, it is essential to recognize the predatory characteristics that exist in both male & female narcissists. The basic elements of reduced or lack of empathy & grandiosity are also shared, along with superficiality, desire for reaction, attention, adoration and admiration.
This section does not intend detailing the ‘total’ picture of the female narcissist in relation to their overall societal involvement, but rather as it is in relation to those participants of Rugby League; and the player in particular.
By attaching themselves to a higher profile individual; in this case a player, the female narcissist is able to fulfill many of those needs they crave and feel they are entitled to. It is a means of receiving their narcissistic supply through ‘association’ & ‘attachment’.
The aspects pertinent to the female narcissist in their involvement with league players are as detailed below:
The damage as a result of engaging or becoming involved with such a person can be very detrimental to the player involved. They may have become emotionally attached and the resultant conflict, separation and loss may result in depression, anxiety, stress and poor coping mechanisms to deal with their feelings. Physical problems may ensue and on-field performance can be adversely affected.
Another disturbing effect is the potential for accusations and revelations of sexual misconduct or other related incidents that may occur. As mentioned in the introduction to this section, the media & the general public find the behaviours of sportspeople fascinating; particularly if it involves misconduct outside the sporting arena. Indiscretions and inappropriate activities have no time limit. Weeks, months & years may pass, yet if the social conditions are suitable, these incidents may surface, allowing the ‘victim’ to expose the player, or players for their actions.
Relationships & families are torn apart, careers are jeopardized, the game is further discredited and the individual player is personally tarnished, labeled & psychologically damaged.
The female narcissist cares little for the marital status of a player. They care little for genuine emotional attachment or planning for future contentment in a relationship with the player or high profile individual; nor are they concerned with society’s value system. It is the ‘here & now’ that matters; the power and control that can be attained; the associated attention to be gleaned.
Not all involvement with these individuals will result in these scenarios. Some evolve and develop into longer term relationships, even marriage. This could provide the ‘point of relative stability’ often evidenced in narcissism. If the player’s profile is maintained, then they may be satisfied. If their desire for superficial, materialism is met, this too may provide for continued involvement with their ‘supplier’.
Always remember the perils of publicity - 'Good & Bad'
Narcissism is also a societal problem with our culture contributing greatly to misplaced priorities, uncertain self image and labile self esteem. We can do little with respect to the larger overall societal framework, though we can, to a large degree, do our part in our own 'small corner of the world'. Education and appropriate, socially acceptable role modeling are the most effective methods of dealing with this ever-increasing problem. Just as we seek out financial advisors to help us manage our income & financial future, so should one whose profile is lifted or heightened, seek out the appropriate advisor/s as to how best they manage the increase in fame, fortune &/or notoriety; how to best psychologically cope with it and how to maintain a level of reality and healthy perspective in their life. The educational aspect should be one of a sustained & systemic, coordinated, strategic, sincere and chronologically longitudinal plan. If this sounds 'long winded' & overly 'complex', let's break it down into each specific individual element.
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